Maybe you’ve been there, sitting in a room full of energy and noise, wondering if your silence means you don’t belong.
I know the feeling. It was 2009, and I had just joined the staff of a large, growing church. I had a general understanding of personality types, but didn’t consider myself introverted, at least not consciously. Back then, I didn’t think much about personality at all.
That changed fast.
Every Tuesday, I sat in staff meetings surrounded by seven extroverted pastors. They talked enthusiastically, often over each other, building ideas as they went. I sat back, listening and collecting my thoughts. It wasn’t that I didn’t care, it was that I cared too much to speak an idea still taking shape. By the time I had something worth saying, the conversation had moved three items down the agenda.
Maybe you can relate. Maybe you’ve gone entire Tuesdays with staff and never said a word. Maybe you’ve sat through university classes, painfully aware that your final grade depends on “participation,” but unable to force a half-formed thought into the open before the moment passes.
This is one of the quiet frustrations of being an introvert. We want to speak, but not over people. We want to share, but not prematurely. We value words, so we don’t waste them. And often, in church ministry, that makes us feel out of place.
If that’s you, I want you to know: you are not alone.
Whether you’re the life of the potluck or the one quietly refilling the coffee in the back, I believe there’s wisdom here for you. I invite you to share your stories, comment, ask questions, and journey with me. I’ve spent the past decade studying introverted leadership from a Christian perspective, academically, practically, and personally.
In fact, my doctoral dissertation was titled: “An Exploration into the Best Practices for Introverted Pastors Working in a Team Context.” As part of that research, I spoke with dozens of leaders who felt isolated, called to public ministry, but wired for internal reflection.
Oh, and I was fired from that church job. Two years in.
And I’m grateful. Truly.
That painful moment pushed me down a path of self-discovery and allowed me to finally embrace the strengths of introversion. I once believed being quiet disqualified me from pastoral ministry. Now I know better.
The Church needs introverts.
The Church needs extroverts.
And most of all, the Church needs us working together, with grace, patience, and understanding.
Part of why I started this blog is to test the waters. Is there a community of introverted leaders who feel this tension? Would a book on introverted leadership in the Church resonate with you? If so, I’d love to hear from you.
Bookmark the page. Come back often. My hope is to offer something worthwhile, something that encourages your soul and affirms your calling.
Blessings,
Josh
The Introverted Pastor 